Most of my friends know that I have developed a major crush on Justin Bieber over the last year. I know what you're saying to yourself "Deb, Justin Bieber? You can't be serious." I know, I know, I never expected this to happen either. I'm older than his mother for goodness sake! So let me tell you how this happened...
The year was 2015. He had just released a new single, Where Are U Now, and I fell in love with it. At first I was all, "This is Justin Bieber? No way this is Justin Bieber. This song is awesome!" But it was. So then he started doing A LOT of press to get back in the spotlight since he had an album coming out later in the year. I saw him on Carpool Karaoke with James Corden. And I was all, "Holy cow, Justin Bieber is, like, looking really grown up. And he's actually SUPER CUTE!" And not just an adorable face but I thought his personality was SUPER cute too. I KNOW,,, like, who knew? Now, JB's always been a good looking kid. I mean, I've never looked at him and said, damn that is one NON-good looking kid. But he was always just that, a KID. He was perpetually 14 yo in my mind.
Then, I checked out his Men's Health Magazine spread. And I was all, "OMG, is this for real? This is what Justin Bieber looks like now?" D.Y.I.N.G.... I mean, damn, he's looking good! And, I'm not even gonna lie... the TATTOOS!!! OMG, loving the tattoos!! I read the article and various other ones about him throughout the year. And I think I just really started connecting more on a personal level at this point. He talked a lot about how hard it is to be so super famous and how isolating it can be (I know, boo hoo!!). How he battles depression and ADHD. And, you know, just other stuff.
When him and Jimmy Fallon go head to head on different games to see who is better, it's hysterical!
So, by this point, he has more new music on the radio and I'm loving every song that comes out. Then, he does a sequel to the Carpool Karaoke with James Corden and it's ridiculously adorable. I've bought his latest album, totally got Jillian into it. Sing every word to every song. Follow him on Facebook. Love all his photos in his #mycalvins. Have watched his movies with Jill. Ugh, just full blown crush.
Where I used to find him immature and disrespectful and, quite honestly, just indifferent to him altogether, now I just find him a little awkward and goofy and funny and totally able to just laugh at himself and completely adorable. I KNOW. STOP. JUST STOP judging me right now.
But all this doesn't exactly explain how he is making me depressed. So, in time, I realized my crush on him is actually more than skin deep. Part of what I am totally crushing on is his actual LIFE. His YOUTH. The way he is living all his dreams and destiny. Doing whatever the hell he wants to do! I didn't exactly do that with my youth. And I think I'm just a little sad about it. I've never wanted to be famous or make tons of money. But I did have dreams and desires as a young person that I never pursued. I moved out of my parents house at a pretty young age and had to work to support myself from thereon out. To me, that was the most important thing. Living on my own and by my own rules. All my dreams and aspirations fell by the wayside when I just didn't have the time or the means to make them happen. I had to work. And there were so many distractions. And the time just went so fast. And I just never really got back on track. Now, don't get me wrong, I had a TON of fun in my youth. I partied a lot, traveled a little. Made life long friends. And I know, that is more than a lot of people can say they did with their youth. But now, in my 40's, I can't help but wonder how different my path would've been if I did all those things I WANTED to do. Not just what I NEEDED to do. And what exactly is my destiny? Am I currently living it? Or did I miss out on it? If I knew at 20 how I would feel at 40, I probably would've done it differently.
There are a lot of young people out there living their destiny right now so I'm not quite sure why I have equated all this to just Justin Bieber. OK, fine, I know. It's the tattoos. It's definitely the tattoos. And I'm not sorry about it!
Monday, June 13, 2016
Friday, June 10, 2016
Another last day of school post!
How does this day keep coming every year?! This year, it's the end of 7th and 4th grades. They have changed so much this school year:
First day:
Last day:
Liam is more than halfway through middle school already. Jillian only has one year left in her school. It's all just going way too fast. Jill asked me the other day "do you miss when we were little babies?" Yes. Yes I do, Jill.
First day:
Last day:
Liam is more than halfway through middle school already. Jillian only has one year left in her school. It's all just going way too fast. Jill asked me the other day "do you miss when we were little babies?" Yes. Yes I do, Jill.
Thursday, June 9, 2016
Jupiter Inlet Lighthouse
I visited this lighthouse in July 2015. I KNOW, it's been a very long time since I've blogged!! Anyway, this is a really beautiful lighthouse on very beautiful grounds. I climbed all the way to the top and the views of Jupiter Inlet are breathtaking!
Will probably go back again this summer!
Will probably go back again this summer!
Monday, March 23, 2015
Body Image
Liam is really starting to notice his body lately. He
makes comments like "when am I going to get my growth spurt?". He asks
me questions all the time like "what's a good exercise for your pecs?"
Or, "how do I get a 6 pack?" He's 12. He's definitely at the stage of
body awareness. He's put on quite a few pounds in the last year but
hasn't quite sprouted upwards. He's got a little pudgy belly going.
He'll look in the mirror and squeeze it into a dimply mass and say "look
how fat I am. This is so ugly." The other night at the dinner table,
he was so discouraged that he hasn't been seeing a lot of results with
the exercising he's been doing lately and stated, "I'm just going to
stop eating". I know he meant this statement very innocently but those
words literally slapped me right across the face when he said them. How
can my perfect little angel not see how beautiful he is?
I tell him things like, he is beautiful and exactly the way he was meant to be. That his body is just starting to go through the stages of becoming a grown up body. It will have many different looks over the next few years. I tell him that not eating at all is NOT HEALTHY! And he should never ever do that. Instead, I try to explain/show him how he can start making positive changes in his body. Give up the sugar. Get off the couch. I tell him to never talk down to himself. Never speak to himself, in a way he wouldn't talk to me. I said, "Liam, would you ever tell me that I'm ugly or that my body is fat and ugly?". He said, no. I said, "well, then never say those things to yourself." But I know from experience that other people's words won't change his thinking. Only he can.
I remember being in high school and thinking that I was so fat I NEEDED to lose weight. I made my self a weight loss shake every morning before school. I was 120 pounds. My parents, and no one else really, just couldn't understand! But I had convinced myself, and nobody could convince me otherwise.
I know we all like to think that it's girls that suffer from poor body image. But boys do too. It's a very real thing. It's not even a gender thing, quite honestly. It's a human thing. I don't know why that voice in our head that tells ourselves we're fat or ugly or wrinkly or unworthy of love isn't wired to tell us that we're beautiful or perfect or unique or worthy instead. We are the only ones that have the power to MAKE that voice tell ourselves those things. But I don't think there is a human on Earth that at one point hasn't suffered through some poor body image. So I know this is totally normal. But as in all situations of being a mother, I want to take that all away from my children. I don't ever want them to be scared or insecure or experience pain. But it is the human experience to experience all of these things. I guess the best thing I can do is just be there to hold their hands and just let them know how perfectly beautiful I see them.
I tell him things like, he is beautiful and exactly the way he was meant to be. That his body is just starting to go through the stages of becoming a grown up body. It will have many different looks over the next few years. I tell him that not eating at all is NOT HEALTHY! And he should never ever do that. Instead, I try to explain/show him how he can start making positive changes in his body. Give up the sugar. Get off the couch. I tell him to never talk down to himself. Never speak to himself, in a way he wouldn't talk to me. I said, "Liam, would you ever tell me that I'm ugly or that my body is fat and ugly?". He said, no. I said, "well, then never say those things to yourself." But I know from experience that other people's words won't change his thinking. Only he can.
I remember being in high school and thinking that I was so fat I NEEDED to lose weight. I made my self a weight loss shake every morning before school. I was 120 pounds. My parents, and no one else really, just couldn't understand! But I had convinced myself, and nobody could convince me otherwise.
I know we all like to think that it's girls that suffer from poor body image. But boys do too. It's a very real thing. It's not even a gender thing, quite honestly. It's a human thing. I don't know why that voice in our head that tells ourselves we're fat or ugly or wrinkly or unworthy of love isn't wired to tell us that we're beautiful or perfect or unique or worthy instead. We are the only ones that have the power to MAKE that voice tell ourselves those things. But I don't think there is a human on Earth that at one point hasn't suffered through some poor body image. So I know this is totally normal. But as in all situations of being a mother, I want to take that all away from my children. I don't ever want them to be scared or insecure or experience pain. But it is the human experience to experience all of these things. I guess the best thing I can do is just be there to hold their hands and just let them know how perfectly beautiful I see them.
Monday, August 18, 2014
The School Bus
Another first day of school! I can't believe how grown up these kids are.
Now, you may notice Liam's face is less than thrilled. The kid didn't blink an eye at the thought of entering 6th grade until we actually got to the school. Then there was a major awakening that "holy shit, this just got real!" Joe and I dropped him off together. The school is so big and there were so many kids. It was overwhelming. But by the time we walked around a bit and figured out where his classes were and where he had to pick up the bus home he was doing much better. Which leads me to the title of this post, THE SCHOOL BUS! A few weeks ago I was absolutely freaking out about the idea that Liam was MOST LIKELY going to have to take the bus. I've mentioned here before that I am TERRIFIED at the thought of "the school bus". So, in all my freaking out, I thought to myself "maybe I should just ask Liam if he's ok with this". So I ask him, "Liam, how would you feel if you had to take the school bus everyday?" He says, "I don't care." Ha. So I realized, the "school bus" is MY fear, not his fear. So we're giving it a try. First day, so far so good.
So, first day of school was a success!
Now, you may notice Liam's face is less than thrilled. The kid didn't blink an eye at the thought of entering 6th grade until we actually got to the school. Then there was a major awakening that "holy shit, this just got real!" Joe and I dropped him off together. The school is so big and there were so many kids. It was overwhelming. But by the time we walked around a bit and figured out where his classes were and where he had to pick up the bus home he was doing much better. Which leads me to the title of this post, THE SCHOOL BUS! A few weeks ago I was absolutely freaking out about the idea that Liam was MOST LIKELY going to have to take the bus. I've mentioned here before that I am TERRIFIED at the thought of "the school bus". So, in all my freaking out, I thought to myself "maybe I should just ask Liam if he's ok with this". So I ask him, "Liam, how would you feel if you had to take the school bus everyday?" He says, "I don't care." Ha. So I realized, the "school bus" is MY fear, not his fear. So we're giving it a try. First day, so far so good.
So, first day of school was a success!
Sunday, June 22, 2014
Hillsboro Inlet Lighthouse
I've been to this lighthouse twice this year. It's a lot of fun. You have to take a ferry from Pompano to get to the island. Otherwise, it is only accessible via private boat. This lighthouse has 175 steps and the tour guides claim that this is the brightest lighthouse in the world! Although, I'm seeing conflicting information on that when I google it. If it's not the brightest in the world, it is definitely the brightest in Florida! It has absolutely beautiful 360 degree views from the top.
They have a statue of the barefoot mailman. You can read what that's all about, here.
They have a statue of the barefoot mailman. You can read what that's all about, here.
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
Cape Florida Lighthouse
I took the kids to Bill Baggs State Park over the weekend. My first lighthouse post! Unfortunately, the lighthouse was closed so we didn't get to climb to the top and see the beautiful views of Key Biscayne.
But we did wonder what a light keeper's life was like back in the 1800's.
And we contemplated life.
And hunted sea snails.
The thing I like about the location of this lighthouse is that you can get a great view of the light house from every angle. There are 109 stairs to get to the top and you can even go right into the actual lens. Very cool!
But we did wonder what a light keeper's life was like back in the 1800's.
The thing I like about the location of this lighthouse is that you can get a great view of the light house from every angle. There are 109 stairs to get to the top and you can even go right into the actual lens. Very cool!
Thursday, March 20, 2014
New floors
So I had some new flooring installed in Jan. Here are some pics for you:
Dining room old:
Dining room new:
Living room old:
Bedroom new:
Dining room old:
Dining room new:
Living room old:
Living Room new:
Bedroom old:
Bedroom new:
So I have to say, I'm still getting used to how dark it is. But I like it. It feels like A LOT more maintenance. And it's definitely noisier than carpet. If there is one tiny speck of anything white on the floor, it feels like it's visible from the space station. For the first few weeks, I was literally sweeping like every 10 min. I finally had to make a rule that I sweep ONCE a day, no matter what is on the floor! But it's fairly easy to dry dust and mop. I just seem to be doing it a lot more often...
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Lighthouses
So if you know me, you probably know that I kind of like
lighthouses. I'm not like totally obsessed with them or anything but if
I'm in an area where a lighthouse is near I would def go out of my way
to see it. Two weeks ago, I went to the Cape Florida Light in Miami. I
went up top, it was really cool. As much as I love going to the top of
a lighthouse, I am totally freaked out because of my fear of heights.
But the view is amazing. And I'm not going to let a little thing like
vertigo get in my way.
Last year when I took the kids to Maine I got to see 4 different lighthouses. Pemaquid, Fort Point Light, Owls Head Light and Marshall Point Light. Now Pemaquid is a staple of visiting Maine and I've been there quite a few times and have at least 50 pictures of it. But I always have to take more pictures of it every time I'm there! But the other 3, we kind of went to coincidentally. We have these Maine passports and you go to all the state parks and get a stamp in your passport. So last trip, me and the kids made it a point to get 3 new stamps in our passports. So when I explained to Joe's mom that we wanted three passport stamps she literally turned into our tour guide through basically all of Midcoast Maine. She would say "Well, if we go to this park, then this park is just a few miles away." And we ended up getting 7 stamps from 7 Maine state parks! Some she had never even been to herself. It was really fun. So, three of the lighthouses we saw just happened to be at some of the state parks. And funny enough, I kept running into people doing some kind of lighthouse "race" where they had a passport that they had to get stamped from certain lighthouses in like one weekend, or something like that.
Last year when I went to Key West, I ended up seeing 3 lighthouses. Key West Light, Loggerhead Key Light and Garden Key Light. Some lighthouses are kind of hard to get to. Like you can only take a boat to get there or they're not open and doing tours all the time. The Key West Light is actually "retired" and was moved from it's original location. But they still do tours. The Garden Key Light is part of Fort Jefferson and is about a 2 hour boat ride off the coast of Key West in the Dry Tortugas. The Loggerhead Key Light is only accessible by private boat. It can be seen from Garden Key, but is about 3 miles off shore. Literally in the middle of the ocean with NOTHING around!
I've been to other lighthouses as well but can't really remember their names. I know one was in SC (I think it may have been Hunting Island Light).
After I went to the Cape Florida Light a few weeks ago I have been fired up about seeing as many Florida lighthouses as I can. There are only about 30. As I go to each one I will take pictures and document them here. If I'm coming to visit you, and there is a lighthouse nearby, don't be surprised if I ask to visit it!
Last year when I took the kids to Maine I got to see 4 different lighthouses. Pemaquid, Fort Point Light, Owls Head Light and Marshall Point Light. Now Pemaquid is a staple of visiting Maine and I've been there quite a few times and have at least 50 pictures of it. But I always have to take more pictures of it every time I'm there! But the other 3, we kind of went to coincidentally. We have these Maine passports and you go to all the state parks and get a stamp in your passport. So last trip, me and the kids made it a point to get 3 new stamps in our passports. So when I explained to Joe's mom that we wanted three passport stamps she literally turned into our tour guide through basically all of Midcoast Maine. She would say "Well, if we go to this park, then this park is just a few miles away." And we ended up getting 7 stamps from 7 Maine state parks! Some she had never even been to herself. It was really fun. So, three of the lighthouses we saw just happened to be at some of the state parks. And funny enough, I kept running into people doing some kind of lighthouse "race" where they had a passport that they had to get stamped from certain lighthouses in like one weekend, or something like that.
Last year when I went to Key West, I ended up seeing 3 lighthouses. Key West Light, Loggerhead Key Light and Garden Key Light. Some lighthouses are kind of hard to get to. Like you can only take a boat to get there or they're not open and doing tours all the time. The Key West Light is actually "retired" and was moved from it's original location. But they still do tours. The Garden Key Light is part of Fort Jefferson and is about a 2 hour boat ride off the coast of Key West in the Dry Tortugas. The Loggerhead Key Light is only accessible by private boat. It can be seen from Garden Key, but is about 3 miles off shore. Literally in the middle of the ocean with NOTHING around!
I've been to other lighthouses as well but can't really remember their names. I know one was in SC (I think it may have been Hunting Island Light).
After I went to the Cape Florida Light a few weeks ago I have been fired up about seeing as many Florida lighthouses as I can. There are only about 30. As I go to each one I will take pictures and document them here. If I'm coming to visit you, and there is a lighthouse nearby, don't be surprised if I ask to visit it!
Monday, February 24, 2014
Sleepover
Jill had her first sleepover this weekend. She invited two friends from school. We all did face masks, I painted all their toes we ate junk food and did crafts. OK, that was Jill's experience, this was mine:
Cook dinner. Hear a little girl I barely know tell me she doesn't like almost everything on the table. Ask Jill to eat her hamburger at least 10 times. Tell Liam to get off the video games and come eat at least 20 times. Do dishes and sweep up dining room. Playing with the bunny. Help Liam start a school project that is due in 5 days. "Mommy, can we do face masks?" Help all little girls put on their face masks. Remove all old polish from little toe nails. Paint 30 little toe nails. Help rinse faces and clean up the massive mess they made in the bathroom. Playing with the bunny. "Mommy, can we have snacks now"? Help open all the snacks. Sit on couch for 10 min. Do more dishes and more sweeping. Playing with the bunny. "Mommy, can we paint pictures now?" Help get out paper, find all crayons and pencils and markers. Sit on couch for 10 min. Clean up all the paper and crayons and pencils and markers. More sweeping. Work on project. Finally sit down to watch a movie. By 11pm I am so exhaused I just don't care anymore. About anything. I declare the girls have to go to Jill's room and stay there. As I put them to bed, they all give me hugs and want me to tuck them in. Wake up and cook pancakes and sausage. But of course, one little girl doesn't like pancakes. So I heat up a homemade frozen waffle for her. She doesn't like it. She wants a bowl of cereal. Dishes, sweeping. Painting pictures, playing with the bunny. Finally! Mommies show up. Yay!
Jill says "that was so fun, we have to do it again!" Oh goodness...
Skippy's experience: I'M NEVER LEAVING MY CAGE AGAIN!
Cook dinner. Hear a little girl I barely know tell me she doesn't like almost everything on the table. Ask Jill to eat her hamburger at least 10 times. Tell Liam to get off the video games and come eat at least 20 times. Do dishes and sweep up dining room. Playing with the bunny. Help Liam start a school project that is due in 5 days. "Mommy, can we do face masks?" Help all little girls put on their face masks. Remove all old polish from little toe nails. Paint 30 little toe nails. Help rinse faces and clean up the massive mess they made in the bathroom. Playing with the bunny. "Mommy, can we have snacks now"? Help open all the snacks. Sit on couch for 10 min. Do more dishes and more sweeping. Playing with the bunny. "Mommy, can we paint pictures now?" Help get out paper, find all crayons and pencils and markers. Sit on couch for 10 min. Clean up all the paper and crayons and pencils and markers. More sweeping. Work on project. Finally sit down to watch a movie. By 11pm I am so exhaused I just don't care anymore. About anything. I declare the girls have to go to Jill's room and stay there. As I put them to bed, they all give me hugs and want me to tuck them in. Wake up and cook pancakes and sausage. But of course, one little girl doesn't like pancakes. So I heat up a homemade frozen waffle for her. She doesn't like it. She wants a bowl of cereal. Dishes, sweeping. Painting pictures, playing with the bunny. Finally! Mommies show up. Yay!
Jill says "that was so fun, we have to do it again!" Oh goodness...
Skippy's experience: I'M NEVER LEAVING MY CAGE AGAIN!
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Well Hello!
I've really missed blogging. I have so many random thoughts but it's hard to make a whole post out of them. But I'm going to try and be better about posting regularly.
Hope everyone is having a great 2014 so far. It's almost March already, OMG! Check back often for more updates!
Hope everyone is having a great 2014 so far. It's almost March already, OMG! Check back often for more updates!
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Honeysuckle
I can remember being young and picking honeysuckle flowers. I would pick out the stamen of the flower and there would be ONE drop of nectar. And I would eat that ONE drop of nectar. But I don't remember where I actually picked these flowers. Or what they actually looked like. What I remember the most is what they smelled like.
I've talked before about what a bad memory I have. And mostly I've joked about it. But the truth is, there's so much of my life I don't actually remember and it makes me sad that I don't remember it. Other people remember their lives. Why don't I? Why am I talking about this? Because I walked into my house tonight and it smelled like honeysuckle. I have no idea why. But all of a sudden I remembered honeysuckle. Which leads me to another phenomena I suffer from - phantom smells...
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
Hi Y'all
Wow, it's been 6 weeks already since I've posted. I got a new computer at work and now I can't access Blogger from work. It's a Google thing. I have so many work Google accounts and I don't know which one is associated to my Blogger login and so it cookies me and blocks me and it's confusing. I understand Google less than I understand iTunes. So now I can only post from home. I'll try to be better about logging in from home.
We celebrated Jill's 8th bday a few weeks ago. Can't believe how grown up that girl is. I made her a pink lemonade cake. It was yummy.
Liam has started to venture out into the world on his own. He is now riding his bike to a friend's house in the neighborhood. It's kind of scary knowing he's out there all by himself but he has really been pushing me for more independence. But he kind of takes it overboard. Because he can go to his friend's house alone now he wants inappropriate video games, to be a "walker" and stay home alone all afternoon, and to watch the movie "chucky" (But my friend has seen it like 15 times, MOM) I said geez Liam, you don't have to do ALL THE GROWN UP THINGS at once now, you know. One thing at a time kid.
Andrea and I went to Key West and Dry Tortugas last month. It was pretty awesome. We met a lot of fun people and had a great time. Dry Tortugas Park was super cool. Literally, a huge fort and lighthouse out in the middle of the ocean. Two lighthouses actually. The fort itself has it's own light, then there is Loggerhead lighthouse about 3 miles away on another island. Watched a beautiful sunset from Mallory Square. It was really a great trip. It had been about 10 yrs since I'd been to Key West.
I participated in a breast cancer walk last weekend. It was tons of fun! I was the second highest fundraiser on my team. Thank you SO MUCH to everyone that donated! It def went to a good cause!!
Besides that, not too much is going on. Just living another day in paradise people...
We celebrated Jill's 8th bday a few weeks ago. Can't believe how grown up that girl is. I made her a pink lemonade cake. It was yummy.
Liam has started to venture out into the world on his own. He is now riding his bike to a friend's house in the neighborhood. It's kind of scary knowing he's out there all by himself but he has really been pushing me for more independence. But he kind of takes it overboard. Because he can go to his friend's house alone now he wants inappropriate video games, to be a "walker" and stay home alone all afternoon, and to watch the movie "chucky" (But my friend has seen it like 15 times, MOM) I said geez Liam, you don't have to do ALL THE GROWN UP THINGS at once now, you know. One thing at a time kid.
Andrea and I went to Key West and Dry Tortugas last month. It was pretty awesome. We met a lot of fun people and had a great time. Dry Tortugas Park was super cool. Literally, a huge fort and lighthouse out in the middle of the ocean. Two lighthouses actually. The fort itself has it's own light, then there is Loggerhead lighthouse about 3 miles away on another island. Watched a beautiful sunset from Mallory Square. It was really a great trip. It had been about 10 yrs since I'd been to Key West.
I participated in a breast cancer walk last weekend. It was tons of fun! I was the second highest fundraiser on my team. Thank you SO MUCH to everyone that donated! It def went to a good cause!!
Besides that, not too much is going on. Just living another day in paradise people...
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Meet Skipper
Jill begged me for about three days to get her a rabbit for her birthday. As most of you know, I have zero desire to take care of any living creatures that I did not give birth to. But, I finally caved.
Monday, August 12, 2013
Back to school
I know I say this every year, but I just can't believe another summer break is winding down. Another school year starting. Liam will be in 5th grade this year. I remember when he was starting kindergarten thinking that he had so many years ahead of him in this big new school. Now, he's a "5th grader". No one above him. He doesn't seem very excited for this school year. I hope that changes once school starts. He has changed so much this year. His behavior constantly reminding me he isn't a little kid anymore. I can't get away with half the stuff I used to with him.
Jill is heading into second grade. I think she's more excited about her school wardrobe rather than actual school. But Jill loves school. I have no doubt she'll have a great year. She'll be 8 yrs old (going on 15) in just 5 short weeks.
As usual, time is just flying by. It never seems to slow down. We've had a good summer. Did a lot of fun stuff. Have some fun stuff coming up.
I've been trying to meditate in an attempt to "reach my higher consciousness" and "get to know my true self". Have you ever meditated (or tried to?)? It's hard. I don't think I'm doing it right. But I will continue trying. Deepak Chopra and Oprah are doing this free 21 day meditation challenge. If you're interested, check it out: https://chopracentermeditation.com/home/?acode=oprah&utm_source=20130724&utm_medium=OcomHPRR&utm_campaign=1
Liam quit football. I can't say I'm 100% disappointed. That league was seriously a full time commitment. Over 12 hrs of practice a week. Game days, parents were expected at the field for EVERY game of the league. NOT just your kids game. Forced volunteering for parents at the concession stands for the ENTIRE game day. Geez, Liam likes football, but come on now. These kids and parents are all consumed with this. Liam wasn't down with it. And I would've stuck it out for him if he wanted to play but, honestly, I wasn't down with it either. Joe and I gave our best speeches about "once you make a commitment you have to follow it through Liam", "you signed up for the team and they need you", "you can't just quit things in life because they're hard". And on and on. Not to mention how much money we (mostly Joe) invested in this league. But not a word of it swayed him. We let him know that ultimately it was his decision and we weren't going to force him to do something that he was not enjoying. He decided he didn't want to play anymore and that was that. I admire how Liam had the guts to stand up for himself to me and Joe and didn't just force himself to do something that he didn't want to do just to please us. That kid's got some guts. I told him that I "admire that he's living his life for himself, and not us". He says he's willing to give football another chance in the future. So I know he's not completely traumatized by the whole situation. I think Joe and I made the right decision for his well being. Parenting WIN!
Enjoy the rest of your summer everyone!
Jill is heading into second grade. I think she's more excited about her school wardrobe rather than actual school. But Jill loves school. I have no doubt she'll have a great year. She'll be 8 yrs old (going on 15) in just 5 short weeks.
As usual, time is just flying by. It never seems to slow down. We've had a good summer. Did a lot of fun stuff. Have some fun stuff coming up.
I've been trying to meditate in an attempt to "reach my higher consciousness" and "get to know my true self". Have you ever meditated (or tried to?)? It's hard. I don't think I'm doing it right. But I will continue trying. Deepak Chopra and Oprah are doing this free 21 day meditation challenge. If you're interested, check it out: https://chopracentermeditation.com/home/?acode=oprah&utm_source=20130724&utm_medium=OcomHPRR&utm_campaign=1
Liam quit football. I can't say I'm 100% disappointed. That league was seriously a full time commitment. Over 12 hrs of practice a week. Game days, parents were expected at the field for EVERY game of the league. NOT just your kids game. Forced volunteering for parents at the concession stands for the ENTIRE game day. Geez, Liam likes football, but come on now. These kids and parents are all consumed with this. Liam wasn't down with it. And I would've stuck it out for him if he wanted to play but, honestly, I wasn't down with it either. Joe and I gave our best speeches about "once you make a commitment you have to follow it through Liam", "you signed up for the team and they need you", "you can't just quit things in life because they're hard". And on and on. Not to mention how much money we (mostly Joe) invested in this league. But not a word of it swayed him. We let him know that ultimately it was his decision and we weren't going to force him to do something that he was not enjoying. He decided he didn't want to play anymore and that was that. I admire how Liam had the guts to stand up for himself to me and Joe and didn't just force himself to do something that he didn't want to do just to please us. That kid's got some guts. I told him that I "admire that he's living his life for himself, and not us". He says he's willing to give football another chance in the future. So I know he's not completely traumatized by the whole situation. I think Joe and I made the right decision for his well being. Parenting WIN!
Enjoy the rest of your summer everyone!
Monday, August 5, 2013
Hi, my name is Debbie and I'm an over reactor
It's true. I've had to apologize many times for my over reacting tendencies. At the time you are over reacting you feel very justified in your behavior. I have an opinion and I'm going to express it dammit! But afterwards, you're just like, you know, that wasn't the biggest deal ever. Then you usually just feel like an idiot and knowing you have to apologize for being such an idiot is dreadful.
I got upset today over a slight misunderstanding about a woman that Joe has been spending time with, with the kids. I got pissed off, called him up and demanded to know "who this woman was!?" And "why is she acting XYZ with MY kids?!" And she "needs to STOP doing XYZ with MY kids bc I don't like it!" Well, that's what I meant to say at least. The problem was, I called him right in the middle of my rage. Which is a big no no for me. I don't communicate well when I'm all raged up. I was so bottled up and emotionally distraught that what actually came out of my mouth was just word vomit. I didn't nearly get out my well practiced "speech" as well as I had it in my mind. Ugh. So now I just look like a lunatic. Who the heck takes a lunatic seriously?
When my friend Lisa was going through her divorce she would say "ya know, people tell you what divorce is like, but no one TELLS you what divorce is like". (yes, I am aware that Joe and I are not actually divorced, but we are basically living a divorced lifestyle) I totally get what she is saying. Every single "new" step in the process is just reopening the wound. The reason it hurts and we lash out is bc it hits us, literally, right in our insecurities and worst fears. For me at least. I felt extremely threatened at the thought of another woman in my kids' lives.
So, what, do you think this woman is BETTER than me?
You think she could take care of my kids BETTER than ME?
What if my kids like her better than me?
Is this the beginning of Joe completely abandoning us?
Logically, I know these things are not true. But it doesn't change the fact that it feels like any one of them could be true. And it is terrifying. It literally feels like a punch in the gut. Just another step in the process I guess...
I got upset today over a slight misunderstanding about a woman that Joe has been spending time with, with the kids. I got pissed off, called him up and demanded to know "who this woman was!?" And "why is she acting XYZ with MY kids?!" And she "needs to STOP doing XYZ with MY kids bc I don't like it!" Well, that's what I meant to say at least. The problem was, I called him right in the middle of my rage. Which is a big no no for me. I don't communicate well when I'm all raged up. I was so bottled up and emotionally distraught that what actually came out of my mouth was just word vomit. I didn't nearly get out my well practiced "speech" as well as I had it in my mind. Ugh. So now I just look like a lunatic. Who the heck takes a lunatic seriously?
When my friend Lisa was going through her divorce she would say "ya know, people tell you what divorce is like, but no one TELLS you what divorce is like". (yes, I am aware that Joe and I are not actually divorced, but we are basically living a divorced lifestyle) I totally get what she is saying. Every single "new" step in the process is just reopening the wound. The reason it hurts and we lash out is bc it hits us, literally, right in our insecurities and worst fears. For me at least. I felt extremely threatened at the thought of another woman in my kids' lives.
So, what, do you think this woman is BETTER than me?
You think she could take care of my kids BETTER than ME?
What if my kids like her better than me?
Is this the beginning of Joe completely abandoning us?
Logically, I know these things are not true. But it doesn't change the fact that it feels like any one of them could be true. And it is terrifying. It literally feels like a punch in the gut. Just another step in the process I guess...
Thursday, July 18, 2013
Football is taking over my life
This is Liam's first season of tackle football. Practice/conditioning has been going on since May. I could see the difference between this league and the flag leagues right away. This is some serious business. When it was just conditioning, practices were 2 hrs 3 nights a week. Which was already too much for me. Joe has always been Liam's head coach so I never really had to go to practices before. And I liked it that way. 6 hours a week sitting at a football field was just ridiculous and torturous to me. On Monday, they started full pads practice. Now practice is 2 1/2 hours 5 nights a week! 12 1/2 freaking hours a WEEK just sitting doing nothing at the field. OMG. This is killing me. I get home from picking the kids up at almost 5:30, then we have to be at the field by 6. No time for a decent dinner. No time to relax after a long day at work/summer camp. When we get home at close to 9 pm, kids have to eat, shower, brush teeth, relax. Our new bedtime is now 10pm. Which I don't like at all. Ugh. Don't even get me started on what goes through my mind when some kid much bigger than Liam completely flattens him on the field. I almost started crying last night :( First game is in 2 weeks. He is awful cute in his pads though...
Friday, June 28, 2013
Hang gliding
I went hang gliding over the weekend. I got it on Groupon. For the actual hang gliding and the "mandatory gratuity" it was less than $100. For about 7 minutes of hang gliding time. Yeah. But it was fun. I would never pay full price to do it again. But I would pay for the experience where they bring you 1 mile up. As opposed to the 1,500 ft I did. Here are a few pics for you.
Getting loaded in:
Take off:
Getting towed to 1, 500 ft:
Getting loaded in:
Take off:
Getting towed to 1, 500 ft:
Coming in for a landing:
Monday, June 24, 2013
Summer Camp
For the first time, the kids are in REAL summer camp. Having my Dad watch them this summer just wasn't really an option. They serve free breakfast and lunch, which is awesome. Except, my kids are so super duper picky in their culinary requirements that what I hear every day is "Lunch was so gross!" "My burrito was wet!" "My turkey sandwich had turkey on it!" Ay, ay, ay. These kids, I swear.
They go on two to three field trips a week. Which requires a school bus to get there. Not crazy about this idea. But mostly they're having fun and doing lots of stuff there. And no one has died yet. However, it really peeves Jill that her camp counselor's daughter is in their group. Apparently, she shows preferential treatment to her own kid. They went to the zoo last week and I asked Jill how it was. "It was terrible. My counselor only bought her daughter a slushy and NO ONE ELSE!" Outrageous! That is downright Jillian abuse.
Overall, they are not crazy about summer camp. But I really don't have a choice. Liam is already asking if he can stay home by himself next summer. Um. No.
They go on two to three field trips a week. Which requires a school bus to get there. Not crazy about this idea. But mostly they're having fun and doing lots of stuff there. And no one has died yet. However, it really peeves Jill that her camp counselor's daughter is in their group. Apparently, she shows preferential treatment to her own kid. They went to the zoo last week and I asked Jill how it was. "It was terrible. My counselor only bought her daughter a slushy and NO ONE ELSE!" Outrageous! That is downright Jillian abuse.
Overall, they are not crazy about summer camp. But I really don't have a choice. Liam is already asking if he can stay home by himself next summer. Um. No.
Monday, June 10, 2013
Portraits
Back in 2007, a portrait company went to the kids' daycare and did these fantastic portraits. I didn't even know about the portrait until they had already finished it and presented it to me. I was totally taken aback and totally fell in love with it. I felt that they REALLY captured both of their expressions so perfectly.
I JUST LOVE IT! I hung them side by side. I love looking at the two portraits side by side and seeing how much they've grown in 5 yrs. The sepia toned portraits are just so beautiful and unique. These make really special gifts! Here is the company's site: http://www.portraits.org/
So recently, I ordered a new portrait with an updated photo:
I JUST LOVE IT! I hung them side by side. I love looking at the two portraits side by side and seeing how much they've grown in 5 yrs. The sepia toned portraits are just so beautiful and unique. These make really special gifts! Here is the company's site: http://www.portraits.org/
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