The lies we tell, Part 2

So, with this being said, I lie.  I do.  I suppose they could be considered fibs.  Little lies.   I notice I fib lie to my kids the most.  From little things like, "mom, do you know where so and so toy is?"  And I tell them, "no, I have no idea where that toy is."  Meanwhile, I know I threw that toy out like 3 days ago.  But sometimes the lies get a little bigger.  A while ago I answered my cell and Jill heard me say "Hey Babe", it was the guy I was seeing.  Right away Jill had to ask "who did you just call babe?"  I said "my friend".  She asked what my friends name is.  I said "Lisa".  "Do I know Lisa?", she asked.  "No", I replied.  "Why would you call your friend babe?  And, where are you going with Lisa?"  "To the movies."  (word for word this is the exact conversation we had*)  And so it spirals.  I don't like lying to my kids but for now this is the way it is.  I suppose this falls under the "covering my ass" clause in my theory of why people lie, reason #2.

Back in December, in an attempt to be transparent, I mentioned to Joe I was seeing someone.  He did not take the news very well.  Part of the reason I even told him is because I thought we were done.  I also wanted to stop hiding it.  Perhaps, start introducing this new person into my daily life.  Apparently, Joe had something else going on in his own mind that was completely unbeknownst to me.  Anyway, I digress.  I bring this up because I have also had to fib lie to Joe about where/how I'm spending my time.  Mostly, when I need him to pick up the kids early on a weekend or from school.  It's hard for me to tell Joe I need him to pick up the kids from school because I'm going to happy hour with my boyfriend.  Cowardly of me, yes.  I know that would hurt his feelings.  He'll probably have questions that I don't want to answer.  Or give me the silent treatment for a week.  Which isn't very fair of me considering the hell I gave him at the beginning of the separation about being honest with me.  And he told me a lot of things that were probably very hard for him to tell me.  But our situation then and our situation now is completely different.  See what I did there?  Justifying my lying.  Reason #1, telling a lie because it's what I think he wants to hear.  And maybe a little bit of #2, avoiding the hurt.

The moral of this post?  I'M JUST A BIG 'OL HYPOCRITE AND YOU SHOULDN'T LISTEN TO ANYTHING I SAY.


*Side story - as part of this conversation Jill says to me "Can I tell Daddy that you called someone babe?"  I told her no.  But she doesn't really understand why.  I had to explain to her that me and Daddy live very separate lives now and Daddy doesn't need to know everything that I do anymore.  It's all a very difficult concept to teach/accept.