My husband hasn't cleaned a bathroom in 8 years. The last time I asked him to clean the bathroom it was when I was 9 mos pregnant with Liam. I just physically couldn't reach into the tub anymore. So he goes into the bathroom, sprays everything with cleanser, then takes paper towels and wipes the cleanser off. That's it. Not a drop of water used. Nothing was clean at all. He honestly felt that this was a totally acceptable way to clean a bathroom. Personally, I think he half assed it so that I would forbid him from ever cleaning a bathroom again. And it worked.
Since the separation he has been doing his own chores. Laundry, ironing, paying his own bills. So we decided that he should also be cleaning the guest bathroom that him and the kids are sharing. So, the other day, I noticed the tub still has black smudge marks all over the bottom. Because my kids are those kids that never wear shoes outside and therefore their feet are always black. The bathtub can never be clean for more than 1 shower.
I ask him, "did you clean the bathtub?" He said yeah. So I show him the bathtub and I said "when you were done cleaning this you actually said to yourself 'Yeah, this looks clean'?" He chuckles and said "well I didn't know what cleaner to use. But I scrubbed it. I didn't have any Pine Sol or anything." Apparently Pine Sol is for scrubbing bathtubs. And it sounds like he didn't use any cleanser at all. Just water and a sponge. I opened up the bathroom cabinet and there are at least 5 different cleansers in there. So I had to give him a little tutorial on which cleaner to use on which surface. But I know he won't listen.
Meanwhile, the day before I went to wash a dish and I couldn't find the sponge. I asked him where it was, he said he used it to clean the bathroom. I said, you don't use the kitchen sponge to clean the bathroom, you use the bathroom sponge to clean the bathroom. He said he couldn't find the bathroom sponge. Funny, when I opened the bathroom cabinet (as mentioned above) it was staring right at me. Right next to all the cleansers. I don't know how he couldn't have seen it. Actually I do know, he never even opened the cabinet.
Here's the kicker. I asked him where the sponge is that he used to clean the bathroom and he said he threw it away. I asked "why?" He said it was dirty, he used it to clean the toilet. So I said "you think that the sponge gets thrown out after one cleaning?" He said, yes. But this is exactly why you don't use the kitchen sponge to clean the bathroom. At least he threw it away.
I think people are becoming scared to make a comment on your last blogs, tough situation. I for one don't clean the bathrooms, and I should do it more often, I do know how and I do know the "rules" of cleaning a bathroom. So I will do my share. But, I do other things around the house that noone else does, with out too much of a fuss, and others in my family do things that I don't at all. Fair share? But I do feel I should help out in the bathrooms, except making sure there is enough TP! EdD
ReplyDeleteI can see that Joe is being difficult. I want to shake him and tell him to shape up! But, honestly, are we getting into real nit picking or what? Does he insist that you mow HALF the yard? It seems to me that the two of you need to decide what you really want. Then, work toward it. Stop finding ways to be mean and start finding ways to be kind. If a couple isn't willing to each give at least 60%, they are doomed. Bob says you need to pick your battles. I say, it the scope of things, there are no big deals... only what you make into a big deal. Believe me, it isn't worth it. I want you both to work it out more than anything. I worry about my little kids. (What are you both teaching them?) I can see short comings in both of you, but I know how stubborn my son can be, (and how immature) so you have my sympathies there. I love both of you. Please try harder!
ReplyDeleteLouise, is that you? Your user name looks weird. Anyway, this is not a bashing story at all. Simply an account of a real situation. Trust me, we both work very hard to make our house a home in all aspects. I'm not nit picking that Joe doesn't clean bathrooms. I just thought it was a funny story to see him try.
ReplyDeleteI know you will believe me when I say, "I FEEL your pain." The truth is that Joe never cleaned a thing growing up, he has never in his life seen his father clean a thing, and it is a well known fact that the men's union puts out brochures advising men to do a bad job on these types of chores so they will never have to do them again. Unlike my mom (who is an enabler on this point), I think it is important that Joe at least try to perform this common household chore. After all, you have a little boy in your home who needs to see this example or else you will someday find find yourself commenting on your daughter-in-law's blog posts regarding her husband's lack of domestic skills.
ReplyDeleteomg lmfao.Classic
ReplyDeleteThat is hilarious. It is funny because my husband will ask me where something is in HIS drawer...lol, and I will say, it is in the 3rd drawer under the red shirt. He will say, "I looked there"...but poof there it is. I think most often we do spoil them and they get customed to a certain life they have been living. Give him time, he will get it. Not doing it after all these years he is a little rusty.
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